The problem is, with online games at least, down to 2 things. Those with short tempers that LOVE to curse and swear and act like immature children (bad-losers), and those that love to over-power their opponents (and allies!) and dominate the game (bad-winners). These people are the same people, but one has experience/skill and the other does not. The problem here is all the rest of us who just want to play a game are stuck with PKers, swear-factories, and people who hold personal vendettas. Take out one of these “dominating” players and they target you as their main target.
It gets old fast and no one enjoys the game. They take things too personally and are not willing to play fair or nice.
I guess this means the problem with getting girls to play online is that guys play online. Not all guys are like this, but enough of them are that it makes it unpleasant for the rest of us, girls and guys. I guess more girls are upset by this than guys, but I have avoided many a video game (like Halo) because of this. Co-op is my favorite, cause it is a team effort, even with enemies, but other guys out there need to take games lighter, and not so serious! I hope to enjoy Metal Gear Online when it is out next week, but I fully expect to run into all the regular problems (I already did in the beta).

I think if online gaming had grown up out of a predominately female section, you would rarely see guys playing. Not really something I’ve thought much about and I’m not a woman, so I can’t really begin to comprehend how that would actually look if it really happened that way. Interesting thought though.

How do you think that it would look if it had happened like that?

One idea that occurred to me is that they’d all play nice and then have bitch sessions afterwards.

Joking-and-deliberate-sexist comments aside,

If the rating system was more social within Xbox live it would probably stamp out the problem. As a middle aged (albeit male) gamer doesn’t want to listen to the same whining teenager who calls girls sluts, then they should be resigned to the lower echelons of the gamer community. Maybe MS could create “Playrooms” for the little boys who need to grow up - and social voting puts them there.

Another nice thing about PS3 is you can change the pitch of your voice. I’ve never done that since I’ve never been harassed before, but it may come handy some day.

Now, back to GoW.

I honestly don’t think GoW can attract girls (who’re not into online shooter games), or anyone who’s not crazy about shooter games as a matter of fact, no matter what they do. Shooting games require a steep learning curve, and getting slaughtered online would drive newbies away before they get good enough to enjoy the game.

Would you consider coming on the show yourself? Seeing as how you’re a gamer as well?

Be sure to set your “zone” correctly; I think a lot of people are using this incorrectly. I myself reside in “Pro” because I’m always about the gg. Win or lose, it doesn’t matter to me; I just want good, friendly, honest competition.

Many of the “abusive, immature, swearing” players are or SHOULD be in the “Underground” zone. If you read through the description….it’s really just saying people in that zone don’t give a f*ck.

Please, please PREFER or AVOID players. People says it doesn’t work, but it does. I’ve come to use it a lot, especially in GoW. ( game is so notorious for early quitting sore losers) You’ll see that after a little while of using it constantly (every match preferably) your unfortunate encounters with the less etiquettely trained will start to dwindle. As a last resort, (except for cheating, which we all should have zero tolerance for) file a complaint. Also, it is okay to avoid players based on skill…..that’s how you avoid the people with “too much time on their hands” or those that have “mastered the game.”

Something very important to take note, because I have been known to drop an f-bomb or two online, is that when I or others like me (possible irl friends) swear or say something “offensive”, it’s never towards a person, but towards the game, in frustration; host advantage, anyone?
Another great grievance that I know most might have ( I know all my friends and I do) is we loathe players that don’t use/have mics. Being in the “Pro” zone, we want to win and to win, communication is key. As a general rule and because I’ve seen this happen online, which I find completely ridiculous, DON’T ever, ever.. talk-trash your own teammates. It makes no sense. It’ll hurt your team, and help theirs.

Remember, you pay for the service. Use it to its fullest.

Me: Hey Gears of War is only $59.99
Her: Oh you’ll spend 60 bucks on a game, but take me to Carl’s Jr. for dinner?
Me: Hey you like Carl’s Jr….
Her: Would that 60 bucks be better spent on something fun we can go do together, OUTSIDE, IN THE REAL WORLD?!
Best Buy dude: Can O help you make a decision on anything?
Me: Yes, do you have a sister is single?

Your argument boils down to the supposition that women are less tolerant of profane and derogatory commentary than men. I have never found this to be the case, but it doesn’t matter either way because the supposition is irrelevant to problem at hand — that kids swear too much. Shooters are havens for “loud-mouthed punk kids” and this will never change — it’s a cultural norm. The only way this will change is if parents change.

The only way to enjoy a shooter is to find a community that polices its servers and strictly enforces rules. The only way to effectively police a community is to have complete control over it, so console games are ruled out here by default. Shooters are better played on PCs, anyway.

For example, I’ve played for years with a group called the Over 30 Club, and they’re the only people I’ll ever play ANY shooter with. I’m 20 myself, but their motto is, “If you’re not 30, fake it.” If you curse up a storm or use racist or defamatory language, you’re permanently banned, and members and visitors alike are held to the same standards. About 5% of the community is female and they’re not afraid of being identified as such because the community is made up of adults who can handle “omg boob-bearers” being present.

Somehow I doubt the sincerity/veracity of Cliffy’s desire to see games made more “girlfriend friendly.” He’s talking about making the games more mature, basically, but in the same sentence he uses the word “tits”. Maybe I’m the only one who sees this as a striking dichotomy indicative of hypocrisy. Is “tits” a word that one uses in polite conversation? I can understand how it could be worked into the vernacular of a game’s fiction, but that was just Cliffy talking to people about his own initiative…

Thanks Veronica for blogging this, it needs to get out there to the people developing these systems and games.

1. People who are abusive or use foul language
2. People who trick the system so they can stomp on people much less experienced than them
3. People who have too much time on their hands and mastered the game the first week
4. And worse once they’ve reached 3, they then turn their sites on having fun by ruining other peoples fun.

So far I’ve had few if any good online experiences. I really expected that as it became more mainstream these experiences would fade and online play would mature. Guess I’m still waiting. Here’s hoping that Nintendo’s opposite strategy gets better too. I like to know that I’m always playing against my friends, but how do I get us all to play at the same time? Perhaps I just need a few hundred more friends who all have the same games that I do…